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Destroy a Spatula. Everyday.

28 Mar

This is Hank’s toy box…

He has an array of dog toys from bouncy balls, soft & squishy jungle animals, Nylabones, SnuggaWubbas and everything in between.  So when we left to meet friends for dinner, having put away all of the food and recycling, we figured he would be able to keep himself busy…if he wasn’t too busy napping after an exhausting romp at the dog park.

We were wrong, again.  Einstein defined insanity as doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.  Sure, it may look as if leaving Hank alone at home is insanity, but in our defense…we do try and alter our actions and “beef up security” before leaving him to his own devices.  It just so happens his curiosity is far more expansive than we can hope to anticipate; therefore, now we close the door, hope for the best and maybe at the worst…laugh about it later.

So this is what we found when we got home…

This came off the drying rack next to the sink, about 5ft off the ground.  Whether it was the chewy plastic challenge, the slapping noise it made on the floor or the fact that it could be swung around viciously…it was extremely fun to play with and Hank had a good time.  But it wasn’t quite enough…

This was a very recent purchase for the upcoming gardening I had planned, but more importantly as a means of washing the dogs after they mud, tar and feather themselves with sticks, leaves, bugs and whatever else they can find while hiking.  Somehow, even though the helpless garden sprayer was sitting inconspicuously in the Lowe’s bag on the floor (“on the floor” being the cardinal mistake this evening) Hank was onto it’s vicious intentions of future bathing and cleanliness, and had to take matters into his own paws…destroy the evil garden sprayer before it could destroy his hard-earned efforts of filthiness.  And he was successful.  This garden sprayer, robbed of its hose attachment, grip handle and adjustable pressure ring, would never be used for dog baths, watering a garden or otherwise.

Human Translation-Garden Sprayer: Stand up for yourself.  Whether it’s protecting the dirt caked in your paws from miles of hard trails traveled, throwing your hat in the ring for a job promotion or swapping out your poor excuse for “me time” with an actual bit of relaxation…remember to take care of yourself.  Priorities will swap and rearrange countless times during a lifetime, but since we only get one, it’s good to keep yourself and your sanity towards the upper echelons of the list.

Human Translation-Spatula: Remember being silly is okay, and always try and have a little fun.  Destroying a spatula has a very simple translation; it’s completely unproductive, silly and useless…but for Hank, it was tons of fun.  For us with opposable thumbs, it’s belting out a Top 40 hit in the car, dancing wildly while vacuuming or doing whatever drums up that ab-crunching, tear bringing laughter.  So everyday, destroy a spatula (at least once).